Kiasuism sucks
Ever since returning to Singapore, Benjamin and I seem to get more ticked off with the kiasu attitude here, and what my friend Merey boldly calls a guilty one to his or her face, Ugly Singaporean. I don’t know if it’s because they’ve gotten “uglier” while we were away (!), or if it’s because we’re less patient the older we get, or more likely, because we’ve experienced that in other countries, kiasu behaviour either hardly exists, or is so frowned upon that others around you will tell you off or look at you with such disgust as if what you’ve done is the most heinous of acts, whereas in Singapore, it’s just accepted as the norm, because we’re known to be kiasu. This really isn’t acceptable, as uniquely Singaporean as it may be.
[kiasu - Hokkien word meaning "scared to lose"; to mean "wanting to get ahead"]
Like most things, anything in moderation may be acceptable…… Go ahead, pop that piece of lovely sio bak in your mouth, savour it… but don’t eat sio bak everyday lah. So same goes for being kiasu… I know Singapore has come this far because of kiasu-ism. That need, that desire, and that will to strive and get ahead is what made this little dot of an island what it is today. But now you’ve gone too far. We are Singapore, Ugly Singapore?
One ugly example from the myriad kiasu acts witnessed everyday:
Why do people who call for a cab (book a taxi via phone) still hog a space in the taxi queue? Firstly, it gives others the impression that the queue is really long, and some might also call to book a cab, thinking that the queue is that long. The queue is long enough as it is, sometimes having to snake around a few times, or stretch all the way and block the entrance of a hotel or shopping mall. But what’s more obvious is the fact that, these ugly people are actually waiting to see which comes first, the cab they booked, or the regular cabs that arrive for passengers who are queuing for real. The ugliest part is, if asked to explain, they would say “What if the taxi I booked doesn’t show up?”. Whuddd? You’re paying a premium to specially book a taxi, and you’re told on the phone that taxi number xxx will arrive in x-mins at the location you specified. This shows that people like this don’t give a damn that somewhere, a taxi driver is making his way over especially for them. These are probably the same type of people who go to restaurants and treat the wait staff like servants.
It’s true that Ben and I hate bad service. But we’re never rude to service staff or taxi drivers (unless provoked first, and even then, it wouldn’t be deemed rudeness but an angry retort in self defense).
In Ben’s last post about our lousy experience at the Grand Hyatt, he posed the question that maybe guests or diners are too demanding these days. I don’t think so. People have to know the great difference between demanding and being plain rude. You can demand for good or proper service without being rude — May I please have a glass of water? And then you can complain without being rude — I asked for a glass of water 15-minutes ago, why is it taking so long? Compared to the rude behaviour that even some of my acquaintances exhibit — Can you please bring me a glass of water? – asked in a haughty tone. Even with the magic word “please”, note the difference: May I please have vs. Can you please bring me. Asking for vs. asking someone to serve you.
If I continue further, this is going to sound like a lesson in etiquette. But in a country that requires Courtesy campaigns, courtesy and social etiquette should be made a compulsory subject in schools and especially universities and higher learning institutes, and even a short seminar that employees have to attend, and pass with flying colours! If one is badly brought up at home, the school system should be the next line in line to nurture the future man with the right attitude. Kiasu-ism can no longer be allowed to be accepted as the norm if we want to position ourselves as a beautiful country with beautiful people.